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There are days when everything’s
going exactly as I want it to. Days I don’t even have to do anything and
everything just somehow falls into place. No effort, no stress, no nothing.
Just pure, unadulterated bliss. And then there are the bloody days when even
your fucking front gate hates your fucking guts. Days like today, I mean.
The bloody thing would just not
respond to anything. I could shout at it, pound at it, kick it – nothing. The
touch panel was broken. Must’ve been Trish
or Susie that did it when they came back from that bloody party yesterday
night. Why the fuck do we even have teens?
“Cat!” I shouted at the living room
window. “Do you have the keys to this bloody gate? The digital lock’s busted!”
Sadly, no answer came. I figured she was just having one of her moods again.
After dealing the hellish contraption one final kick, I let out a sigh and
threw my briefcase over it. Then I tried to throw my body over it. With much
sweat and heaving, I finally managed to wrestle my belly over the gate and found
myself on the pavement. I straightened my tie and wiped the sweat off my
forehead. Well done, Jimbo. You’ve made
it to the other side even though the world hates you today. You’ve earned a
bloody medal.
The grey sky reflected off of my
car’s freshly waxed surface. With a pleasant bwoop, the vehicle unlocked when I pressed the button on my
keycard. I was glad that at least the car was being nice to me. Up until a
certain point, at least.
The screen to my left showed me the
same screen that greets me every morning. I tapped the same icons as usual,
setting the course for my workplace. I put my hands on my face, trying to
cleanse myself off all the remaining frustration, awaiting the car to take me
away somewhere. That moment took longer than usual. I opened my eyes.
“Oh, for fuck’s sake.” The screen
flashed red with a big “system error” message. As if the day hadn’t been bad
enough, I had to drive the car manually to work. Don’t panic. You can do this. It’s just a 20-minute drive.
It was a 20-minute drive when I used
the autopilot. Turned out to be quite a bit longer when I had to do the driving
myself. I always found the steering wheel to be a clunky device and I was
pretty confident that whenever I took control of the car it would end in an
accident. On top of that fear, I was growing more and more angry and frustrated
over the fact that I was going to be late. Needless to say, my hands were
shaking like a bloody Chihuahua.
Almost 30 minutes late, I’d finally
arrived at my work’s car park. A glance at the mirror showed me my balding
scalp had turned beet red and dripping with sweat. As I parked, the backside of
the car gently brushed the wall. Don’t
let it be scratched, please. Don’t let it be scratched. I quickly got out
of the car and took a look. It did get scratched. I kicked the car’s tire,
injuring my big toe in the process.
“Fuck!”
But then it was all okay. I’d
straightened my tie again and was taking the lift up to my office. Through its
glass walls I saw the magnificent cityscape. Despite the lousy weather, the
jagged, glass horizon formed by all the new buildings never ceased to amaze me.
Bent into striking shapes and illuminated by faint white lights even in the
daytime, the structures were a sight that was for some reason soothing. I took
a deep breath, feeling the frustration leave my body, when I heard a soft ding announcing that I had reached my
destination.
Without making a sound, the door
opened. As I entered, my heart sank. The whole room was empty. All the desks
were vacant. The computers were mostly on, however, with several holoscreens
flickering. It all seemed as if everyone just left the room to-
“Fuck!” I swore in a whisper that
was much too loud. As if the day could not get worse, I remembered there was an
important meeting scheduled for that day. The door to the boss’ office flew
wide open and a crowd of smartly dressed people came filing out of the room,
confirming my fears. I tried to force my way through the stampede and finally
found myself face-to-face with Garry Ferguson, my boss. I was heaving and
sweating yet again, clutching my knees as I leaned down to catch my breath.
“Nice of you to finally arrive,
James,” he said with a grin showcasing his sparkling, perfectly even teeth.
Despite their impeccable evenness, Garry had a lisp. That’s why I would always
cringe whenever I heard him say my full name.
“I’m really sorry, Garry,” I said as
I straightened my tie for what was probably the millionth fucking time that day.
“It’s just… Everything’s just… Do you ever have one of those days-“
“You know what, James?” he said with
that blasted lisp again. His grin, however, had faded. “I don’t really think
this is working out.”
“What do you mean?”
“The meeting we had today was very
important. That new Japanese doll
system we mentioned some time ago, remember that? Well, that’s what the meeting
was about.”
“Okay.” I wasn’t exactly sure if I
remembered or not.
“And we’re implementing it next
week. What that means is that we need to become even more efficient, more
aggressive, more sleek.” I cringed at that last word. I know he did his best at
it, but it came out as thleek. “We need
to cut corners, is all I mean.”
“Well, that’s one thing I can be
sure I’m good at,” I joked. He didn’t seem to get it. “Just ask my wife.”
“Boone,” he said with a stern face.
My heart sank. If he addressed you with your last name, you could be sure that
was no good. “This isn’t the first time that you’ve proved inadequate and we can no longer afford
to sustain people who lag behind. I want you to pack your things.”
“No, Garry, wait-“
“I want you out by 12.”
Before I knew it, I was out of his
office and the wooden door slammed in front of my face. For a moment I was sure
all I could hear was faint static at the back of my head. Next thing I knew I
was in the lift again. The tall structures grew larger and more imposing the
lower I went. I felt as if I was being crushed.
Still faint from all that had
happened, I got in the car. Instinctively, my hand reached for the side panel.
A red light came up once again. Guess I
need to take the wheel again.
The drive home went surprisingly
smoothly. Before I knew it, I was parked in front of my house. Maybe it’s all just some crazy dream? I
mean, I’m not even angry. It’s all so surreal. The gate was still broken,
so I leapt over it once more. This time I forgot to take my briefcase from the
car with me, so I had to go over the gate two more times. I then stood in front
of the door for a while. I felt so detached from everything, as if the body
wasn’t even mine and I couldn’t feel anything. I giggled. The numbness felt
funny. I grabbed the doorknob and opened the door, wondering what other
interesting things might happen today.
I dropped my briefcase by the
entrance and went straight ahead upstairs. At that time, I didn’t even hear
anything or notice anything strange. I think I still felt that static. But the
instant I opened the bedroom door, I noticed what was wrong.
“Fuck.”
The two bodies in my bed began to
spin around in a panic.
“Why the fuck are you here?” my wife Catherine asked as she emerged from
under the sheets, her auburn hair tangled and falling on her gaunt face. Her
lips were trembling, her face pale as she fixed her gaze on me. And I must have
had the dumbest expression on my face.
“Well, you know, I used to sleep in that bed with you. Is
it really so surprising that I’m here now? And who’s the lad with you?” As soon
as he showed his shaggy head from under the sheets, I recognized him. “Matt,” I
gasped. Now that I did not see
coming. Matt was a longtime friend of ours, along with his wife, Melissa. My
eye twitched. “Now you’ll tell me Melissa’s there with you as well.”
He sent me a nervous grin as he got
up from under the sheets and put on some trousers. He was tall and much more
fit than I was, despite being roughly the same age. As he turned to me, I
noticed the nervousness disappear from his grin. He now stood there in front of
me. I think he was trying to intimidate me. I think it worked. The next thing I
knew I had him pinned to the floor, my fist prepared to strike his dumb face.
“You can hit me all you want, mate,”
he grinned. “But dear Cat here’s made her choices. It’s not my fault she’d
rather fuck me than you.”
“Oh yeah? Are you suggesting it’s
mine, then!” I shouted, spitting all over his face.
“Stop that, right now!” I could hear
Cat shout from the bed. “I will not tolerate this!”
“And what if I am, huh? You’ll hit
me? I’d like to see you try,” Matt’s grin became crooked. “You and I both know
you won’t do it. You’re too weak.”
“Don’t provoke him!” Cat shouted.
“Just let it go.”
Let it go,
she says. I felt detached from everything once again. Despite my rage boiling
somewhere deep inside, somewhere deeper I somehow did not give a fuck.
Everything was messed up anyway. So I got up and turned around. I noticed Cat’s
expression change.
“So you’re just going to leave this
all like that?”
“You said yourself that you won’t
tolerate it. I don’t think I give a fuck anymore at this point.”
“You don’t give a fuck…” I could
tell she was fighting back tears. “So this marriage means nothing to you? You
won’t fight for anything?”
“Why bother?” as I said this, I left
the room. I could hear Cat shout something in the distance, but I didn’t care
enough to even try to understand the specific words. On my way downstairs I
bumped into Trish as she snuck into the house from the back entrance. “And why
the fuck are you not at school?”
“Dad!” she gasped. She was clearly
shaken, had deep shadows under her eyes and looked positively exhausted. “I
thought you were at work.”
“Well, as you can see, I’m not. Let
me guess, neither of you came back from the party for the night.” Her response
consisted of looking down at her feet. A part of me was furious, but then it
was replaced by something wonderful. I really didn’t have to do anything
anymore. I could just leave it all behind and let someone else do the cleaning
up. The world hated me as it was anyway. “Well, it’s none of my business
anymore anyway, so bye!”
She said nothing as I left. The last
time I saw her face, she was absolutely stunned by what I had told her. I hoped
Susan was okay. Disregarding that, I approached the car, whose front window was
now adorned with a lovely spot of bird shit.
“How lovely!” I shouted with a big
grin on my face. My hands shook as I opened the door and entered the car. I
didn’t even bother with the autopilot this time around, I just turned the
keycard and just rode straight ahead of me. I was sure I was speeding, but that
was the point. I wanted to go as far away as I could, as fast as I could.
Then I reached the roundabout.
Roundabouts are safe, they said.
Unless some fucking twat decides to enter it when they shouldn’t. Needless to
say, my car was hit. Badly. I lost consciousness. I was pretty sure I was dead.
But then I found myself in a place that was completely white, almost blindingly
so. I was standing in a circle that I formed with ten human-shaped shadows. In
the middle of the circle, a naked woman was hovering in midair. The Contact, a featureless voice in my
head said. She was quite stunning. She must have been in her late twenties. Her
cropped brown hair gave her a bit of an edgy look, but that was evened out by
the big brown eyes that seemed to shine with innocence in all this. To top it
all off, she had an amazing body. It didn’t seem appropriate to gawk at that,
however, so I turned my gaze away.
And then the light appeared. A red
ray of light burst out of the girl’s forehead, piercing the sky above us,
dispersing the milk-white substance that now looked a bit like clouds.
Something descended from there. I couldn’t see it clearly from where I stood,
but I believe it had wings made out of fire and a giant, rainbow-colored eye.
The sight was pretty shocking, and yet I just stood there, unable to move,
trying not to die out of the sheer terror I was feeling. I think it said
something to us.
And then I opened my eyes. I was
lying on the ground, my eyes gazing into the sky above me, at the numerous
spots of light that were visible even despite the thick clouds. That’s them. I sat up on the grass. For
some reason, I was in the middle of the roundabout, my car lay mangled next to
me, reeking of smoke and oil. And yet there was no scratch on me. The people
around me had left their cars, and gazed into the sky, a nervous murmur in the
air. Even the police and the medics and the dumbass that crashed his car into
mine were looking up with their mouths agape. I reached for my phone in my
pocket. Thankfully, it was in perfect condition too. For some reason, I knew
exactly what I needed to do now. So I booked a flight.
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